How can you want that?

I was texting a foster momma friend earlier this morning with this momentary rant: 

"[Sometimes I get so tired of] hearing 'I just want to go home' or 'I just want my mom.' My mind is screaming, 'how can you want that insane crazy drama over this stability? How can you want her [extreme] selfishness over our sacrifice?' UGH!!!!"

In the middle of my ranting and railing, God struck my heart with the convicting thought that He might just be crying out the same thing to me. 

I know the analogy may not be perfect, but bear with me....

Just as our little Princess Petunia simply can not see the danger and chaos that abounded and still abounds in her 'real home,' I can become blinded to the danger and chaos of the reality of sin in my life. As adults, Jared and I can clearly see how drugs and domestic violence pose a real threat to PP's future. She, however, only sees her mom and her brothers and her bed and her toys. She can't see the true big picture of what her life was like and the things that so desperately need to change.

I am the same exact way. We've been studying Revelation over the past several weeks in church. Revelation is filled with strikingly vivid portraits of the true destructive nature of sin and Satan as well as his ultimate destiny. I read this Word and hear it taught Sunday after Sunday, and yet, how many times daily do I still yearn for the momentary, fleeting nature of sin's 'comforts' and ignore the big true picture? It is SO easy at times to just cave and not press on. How can I want that? 

It is in moments like this morning, when God gently shows me that while He may be using Jared and me to minister to and teach our sweet little Princess Petunia, He is also using her to minister to and teach us.