Sunday, May 8, 2016
I tried to keep from getting all somber and introspective on what is supposed to be a warm, fuzzy, celebratory kind of day. Really, I did. I failed miserably. I guess that's understandable since this year I'm sharing this day with two other mommas. One who placed her baby girl willingly forever into our arms. The other who definitely did not. Sobering thoughts indeed.
Today brought with it so many intense emotions that are just impossible to articulate. How do you describe what happens to your heart when a bio mom hands you a Mother's Day Card? Or when you hold her as she grieves being separated from her little boy? Or when you watch them share the sweet innocence of swinging together on a beautiful afternoon? Or when you literally ache for her to know and trust how much she is treasured by Jesus?
These truly must be "groanings too deep for words."
And the hardest part is that there is no life-changing, heart-warming resolution to these emotions. Not now anyway.
And that's ok.
Because sometimes life is hard. Sometimes life brings you into situations that seem irreparably broken. But, to quote Jason Johnson, "Broken things don't have to be final things. This is our hope in foster care. It has to be."